It’s the end of the Ro’d for Khanna – Latest News
1. #FreeRoKhanna…from Congress
by Evan Milenko, author
*Record scratch. Freeze body.* Yep, that’s me, Ro Khanna. You’re in all probability questioning how I ended up in the West Bank.
Congressman Ro Khanna launched a national media tour this week, and is now recounting the true injustice of the Middle East: the IDF stopping him for 90 minutes from driving down a restricted highway.
Congressman Ro Khanna launched a national media tour this week, and is now recounting the true injustice of the Middle East: the IDF stopping him for 90 minutes from driving down a restricted highway. AP Photo/Meg Kinnard
Except… Ro wished this to occur. He already needed a PR stunt to distract his indignant constituents from his “wealth tax,” however then he went and endorsed Graham “Nazi Tattoo” Platner for Senate, who’s now additionally — oops — an alleged sexual predator.
So he traveled on a restricted highway in the West Bank alongside a New York Times photographer for an anti-climactic photo-op.
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Congrats on the head begin for the 2028 major that’s sure to be a contest of who can out-Palestine whom.
But the constituents you’ve betrayed will guarantee you’ve gotten no shot in ’28. It’s the end of the Ro’d, clown.
Except… Ro wished this to occur. He already needed a PR stunt to distract his indignant constituents from his “wealth tax,” however then he went and endorsed Graham “Nazi Tattoo” Platner for Senate, who’s now additionally — oops — an alleged sexual predator. REUTERS
But the constituents you’ve betrayed will guarantee you’ve gotten no shot in ’28. It’s the end of the Ro’d, clown. Anadolu through Getty Images
2. Literally what?
by Mike Solana, editor-in-chief
According to his buddy “Androgenic,” fitness influencer Connor Murphy died final week after injecting… gold?
Which he believed to be a “gatekept mineral by the higher-ups” (true) that granted ~ the elites ~ superpowers when ingested (not true).
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Elsewhere, a homosexual cruise was turned away from its second Muslim nation, leaving ship-stranded passengers someway oblivious that the relaxation of the world isn’t livid, whereas back home, an unlawful immigrant baby rapist pardoned final month by Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz in an effort to protect him from deportation (???) was lastly, nonetheless, deported.
Shout out to the web, the place all of these really weird people have been in a position to domesticate a fictional sense of actuality, be it “gold is magic” or “rape doesn’t count if he’s from a Third World country.”
Fortunately, the web can also be a place the place we will focus on such issues, however today I’m wondering if it’s value it.
An unlawful immigrant baby rapist pardoned final month by Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz in an effort to protect him from deportation (???) was lastly, nonetheless, deported Star Tribune through Getty Images
3. California driver purge (please)
by Evan Milenko, author
The DMV will probably be making 11,000 California residents retake their written driver’s examination because of “irregularities” that indicated dishonest.
For the first time in recorded historical past, the DMV has carried out one thing. And it’s a good factor too!?
People who’re covertly asking ChatGPT “what do you do at a stop sign?” ought to be condemned to driving Lime Scooters for the relaxation of their sorry lives.
But 11,000 will not be enough. Anyone who has pushed in California is aware of that there are MAYBE 5 people who know what an unprotected left is.
So please, DMV, get to snatching more people’s IDs. Can you think about what this could do for the state’s site visitors downside?
And whereas we’re nonetheless dreaming, let’s additionally implement presenting a driver’s license at the poll box.
If you’re doing 40 in the carpool lane on the 101, you shouldn’t get to vote on tax coverage. Now go unlock your scooter.
